


Triple Crown

by foreverinprinxietyhell



Category: Impractical Jokers
Genre: Alcohol, Cooking Dinner, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Polygamy, Slow Dancing, Teasing, Threesome - M/M/M, dinner date, dressing up, faking an illness, making a toast
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-08-21
Packaged: 2018-12-17 11:01:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11850222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foreverinprinxietyhell/pseuds/foreverinprinxietyhell





	Triple Crown

Keeping a steady relationship between three men proved to have its challenges, but the six month mark had come in the blink of an eye with little arguments between them; they were far from perfect, but there was a mutual determination to make this work. Not one for celebrating such occasions, the oldest one decided to go against his usual nature and began to enlist help from a mutual best friend.

“Joey, my boy, I need your help,” Brian brought up while the two were alone, his movements shaky with nervousness of having this idea be overheard, “You gotta promise that you won’t tell Sal and Murr though.” 

“Sure thing, I assumed as much. Planning’ something special?”

“You could say that, but they’re more special than anything I could come up with.”

“Give yourself some credit, man, they’re your boyfriends after all.”

“You have a point…”

“Don’t I always? Anyway, why exactly do you need me?”

“Well, I was hoping that you could teach me how to waltz.”

“I’m a bit rusty, but we’ll have to make due.”

Sneaking away from set proved to be a harder task than it had been in the earlier days since a new addition to the couple had happened a few months after Brian had confessed his feelings to the youngest man; the balding man proved to be the clingiest of them, which proved unbearable at times when personal space was required after a long day of work yet was tolerable since cuddling became a favorite pastime even when they were out of bed. Luckily an alibi had been provided by an accomplice about Q suddenly not feeling well and offering to drive him home since the couple had carpooled. 

“I love you, babe, but I don’t wanna catch any germs…” Sal stated as a kiss was blown in the other’s direction, emerald eyes darkening with worry.

“Doesn’t seem to bother you when we make out.”

“’Cos you don’t cough when our lips are locked.”

“Are you sure we don’t need to come home?” James asked, barely able to fight the urge to pull the supposedly sickened man in for a hug when an arm anchored him into place, “I’d hate for you to need us and we won’t be readily available.”

“I think I can manage for a few hours, it’s probably just the flu.”

“Sure, but it could become worse!” 

“I’ll be fine, Sally. Besides, the kitties will help me feel better before ya know it.”

Departing with such sweet sentiments, it took every ounce of composure to keep up the charade as he was escorted outside and helped into an awaiting vehicle. A sinking feeling wormed a way into his heart, for there had been an agreement to not keep secrets even though this would only serve in helping their relationship continue to grow, anxiety over how the plan would be exactly executed claiming a usually stable mind when he was startled by a cleared throat two feet away as a palm gently shook at a turned shoulder.

“Sorry, can you repeat that?”

“What all do you have up your sleeve? Can’t just be dancing, you’re a ‘go big or go home’ kinda guy.”

“Well, I was thinking of cooking dinner, but not the cliché sorta stuff.”

“Hmm… Eggplant parmesan could work.”

“How the hell do ya expect me to cook something that sophisticated?” 

“You’ve got an Italian on standby, I got your back.”

Unable to prevent a sharp snort from blowing through nostrils, he reluctantly agreed to let Joe handle dinner while on standby to assist whenever an extra hand was needed after they were greeted by a swarm of fluffy bodies upon arriving home. Cooing in a high-pitched voice, Q could not help automatically scooping each cat into his arms to kiss their perked ears, blushing when a light scolding tone told him to wash up before adjourning to the oven. 

“Can you pull this off? They’ll get suspicious if you’re not back at a reasonable time.”

“Eh, they’re not my wife, so I’ll just blame traffic.”

“Without a traffic cam to back that up?”

“Touché, I’ll post one on the way back,” he reasoned while ingredients were gathered onto a recently cleaned counter, a pan of water starting to simmer, “Worth it to help y’all get hitched.” 

“How did you know?”

“I’m familiar with the terror that comes before proposing, granted that was three years ago.”

“My main concern is that if this works, who’d marry three men? That’s not exactly traditional.” 

“Sal isn’t the only ordained minister.”

“You’d do that for us?”

“Of course, what kinda friend would I be to let lovebirds suffer?” 

Giving a side hug in appreciation, Brian continued to assist until he was shooed away to go get ready once a text went off to alert them of the others being too concerned to stay away for much longer. Skipping up the stairs two at a time, a brisk shower soothed knotted muscles at a higher temperature than used to; luckily time was saved with not having to spend at least thirty minutes blow drying long curls now that they had been shaved off, running slightly calloused fingers through to straighten shortened strands before toweling off as he entered the shared bedroom in only a pair of briefs as a pre-selected outfit was taken from a nearby closet. 

Completely clothed in formal attire with a vest rather than a heavier jacket, a brow furrowed in concentration as an orange silk tie fought every step of the way until a tulip knot had been formed, his concentration broken when the front door opened from below to signal that the two were home in record time. Velvet box opened quickly to pocket both bands of metal, he nearly dropped the precious pieces of jewelry when he startled at abruptly being joined in the room as accusatory looks could be felt staring into his turned back.

“What do you think you’re doing out of bed?!” Salvatore questioned despite knowing at this point that the man was not actually ill, “You’ve got something up your sleeve, so start explaining.”

“Believe me, I will when you two dress the part.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Trust me, just change and meet me downstairs, okay?”

“Fine…” 

Feeling guilty for giving such a false claim, twin kisses were exchanged as a form of apology before the mastermind behind such a plot slipped out to check on his confidant’s progress when he was met with an empty room with only a folded note left behind beside the finished food. 

_Sorry I couldn’t stay longer, but I figured you could use the privacy. Knock ‘em dead, Q, they’ll have to say yes._

Sighing softly at the encouragement, a distraction was put up by transferring the pasta out onto a pre-decorated table when he turned around to be met by two tantalizing sights that took his breath away; a beige three piece suit brought out Sal’s bronzed skin while Murr opted for a similar look in charcoal along with a dark purple bow tie, “Well, what do we have here, handsome gentlemen I presume?”

“At your request,” Murr mused with a slight bow of the head, getting giggles at how formal he was being as opposed to the other man whom stepped forward without any hesitation to press a peck along a bearded cheek, “I hope you’re on the menu at some point.”

“No dessert before the main course, you should know that by now.”

“Can you blame me for having a craving?”

“’Course not, silly,” Brian chuckled, lips locking together before escorting them to designated seats as a soft breeze started to tease at small flames atop tapering candles, an incisor nipping at his bottom lip when fingers pinched through the thin fabric of his trousers, “Sneaky little ferret…”

“Oops, my hand slipped.”

“Sure it did.”

“Quinny, I hate to interrupt, but can we have a toast?” Salvatore interjected, a bright pink blush coloring stubble covered cheeks since it was not as common as a nickname as others even though it proved effective.

Nodding an answer, a long-necked bottle was tipped over to fill flutes with red that seemed to be their weakness, passing the drinks around as the bowl nestled in a cupped palm, “To the loves of my life, whom I’d be lost without.”

“To our handsome host, and to Joe for cooking dinner. Never even did that for me when we lived together.”

“How’d you know it was him?’

“He was in the kitchen when we barged in on ya, thought he was making soup.”

“Surprised you didn’t make a beeline for it then, ferret.” 

“Your wellbeing mattered more, it always does.”

Touched by such a declaration, clinks echoed on the patio while hearty sips were taken, layers of pasta cut into as helpings were distributed along with pieces of bread that had not been noticed until an unknown basket was pointed out. A sense of completeness came over the older one unexpectedly at sharing in a surprise meal that would define the rest of their lives, yet for some reason that notion did not frighten him nearly as bad while food filled empty stomachs in a chorus of silverware scraping against plates.

“Didn’t expect to have a secret chef in our midst.” Sal mused, swiping dough across excess tomato sauce to eat delicately before offering it to the man on his left.

“For a germaphobe, you sure don’t mind double dipping and sharing food.”

“Gonna blame me for fattening you up a bit?” 

“I like the way I am, thank you very much, but I wouldn’t mind you filling me up.”

“Not so fast, gentlemen,” Brian chuckled at their haste to rendezvous to the bedroom, “I have a few more ideas on our agenda.” 

“Babe, how long do we gotta wait?” 

“Patience, Sally. You’ve been so demanding today, it’s like you’re not grateful.”

“I am, Bri, I just want to be near you.”

“You are, sweetheart.” he responded in a soft voice, moving to sit beside the man in question as their fingers twined.

“It’s silly… We work and live together, you think I’d be able to last a few hours without you.”

“You’re a sensitive guy, it’s fine.” 

“Don’t you start with that damned song!”

Guffawing at such a reaction, the oldest began to hum a melody that had been created for a challenge from a few seasons back much to his partner’s chagrin as he was pulled into a firm embrace, the porch left behind in favor for the freshly manicured lawn while the sun started to set. Shakily grabbing thick hips, he tried to remember how the dance had been described earlier as he began to lead with a subtle sway that contagiously caught on to the younger one as their foreheads rested against each other. 

“Didn’t know I was dating such a romantic. What’s gotten into you?”

“Can’t a guy celebrate having two handsome fellas in his life without having an ulterior motive?”

“If it were anyone else, they could.”

“I’d be offended if I didn’t love you so much,” he retorted with a fake eye roll, leaning forward for a long, slow kiss that broke only when their lungs started to burn in silent protest, taking the opportunity to kneel, “I’d be lost without you, Salvatore.”

“Bri…?”

“Would you marry me?”

Tears already started to cloud the forest green gaze when a vigorous nod signaled acceptance as he fell into awaiting arms, sappy sobs rocking his frame as the ring slid into place. Sharing multiple ‘I love yous’, the pair were met with the third member who could not hide how happy he felt for them even as a slight sense of insecurity seeped into thin facial features; try as he may to suppress emotion, it was not hard to tell how he really felt, for he had been left out until recently, “Baby, can you move over a bit? I have a feeling I’m gonna need to comfort our boy too.”

“Whatdya mean by that?”

“Well, I happen to have two rings and I was wondering if you’d marry me too.” 

“Are you serious?”

“I wouldn’t joke about such a serious matter, we’re not quite complete without you, Murray.” 

“Then I accept, yes,” he answered, filling the empty arm gracefully in order not to knock them over, a slender finger weighed down by a similar silver circle that occupied the other’s hand, “How long have you planned this?”

“A month, I was waiting for the perfect weather.”

“Wait a minute… That day when we filmed at a bridal shop, did you buy them then?”

“Guilty.”

“Son of a bitch, tryin’ to make us think you’re still skeptical of marriage.”

“You’ve proven me wrong, so I had to show my gratitude properly.”

“You’ve gone beyond what we’d ever expect,” Murr teased, kissing both back and forth in a repeated rhythm, the last one landing on the proposer’s mouth for a prolonged moment, “Can I have a dance?” 

“I was going to ask you that, but how can I deny either of my fiancés?”

Taking turns the three spent the evening ballroom dancing out in the grass without a care in the world, letting their stomachs slowly settle before another activity could be suggested. Not wanting to turn down such an offer, dirty dishes were long forgotten as they returned to a neatly made king-sized bed only to dishevel it within minutes when a pile of formal attire formed at the foot of the piece of furniture. Not knowing where he would be without them, no amount of joy could be cloaked by a usually stoic face even as the two were taken better care of than he tended to treat himself, for both best friends deserved to know without a doubt how much they meant as pads of fingers traced over every single uncovered curve, touches barely felt as passion punctuated the air to cement the couple’s unwavering love firmly into place.


End file.
